Home, where those guards stand waiting silently for me

Welcome to our humble abode. While many folks come to visit only once, many more find this end as a means of life. The most interesting and intriguing aspect is the casualness and comfort criminal clan cliques have in our family’s home.

Our relative’s house is not inviting, warm or nicely decorated. The walls are cold and solid. Doors open only when the controller knows it’s safe. There are no weapons here, except those fabricated by the guests. Forget a nicely appointed lavatory. No, a stainless-steel, door-free commode offers absolute frankness.

The home isn’t small either; it can have 3,000 bedrooms and a kitchen big enough to feed its guests. The dress code is consistently adhered to collectively by all of the VIPs and the flip-flops offer a sole little comfort.

Let’s not even discuss the tainted window. The bar-laced view and razor-sharp fences encapsulate any sense of freedom.

One time I can almost understand. But, as a recent boarder eloquently expressed, “This makes 28 times I’ve been arrested” while heading to these inviting accommodations.

Wow. When do lessons get learned?

If incarceration rate is a measurement stick for success, we’ve won, but at what cost?

Not venturing too far from my original point, it baffles me when I overhear the familiarity of that phone call notifying a family member they’re heading off to jail. I can’t help but shake my head. I would change my behavior, who I hang out with, and start a new life. I could never get used to a stainless-steel toilet.

Wake up! Let’s get going. “Control, 269 I’ll be 10-8.”

■ July 6. The reporting person calls from North Las Vegas concerned about his 1-year-old child, alleging mom uses cocaine and won’t let him see the baby. Officers check on the child over on the lakeside and make contact with the child and mom. Problem is mommy has a warrant. Officers place the child with grandma. Some things are more important than others; take care of unpaid citations.

■ July 7. A car is spotted speeding up U.S. Highway 93 from Lake Mead. Traveling 70 mph here is 25 mph over the speed limit, so the lights come on. After making contact, the officer sees the car’s occupant’s blood pressure hopping. A doggy sniff here or there reveals heroin. What? The passenger is a convicted felon and he has a gun. See you in a few years, Mr. Nervous Speeder!

■ July 8. A resident wants to report a suspicious incident and pays a visit to the police department. Officers are told about a phone call received recently. The resident explains the caller reported being that person’s grandson and needed money to bail out jail. The resourceful resident is no dummy. The alleged grandson is told a few things need to be investigated. The now-upset caller hangs up. A word to the wise. Do not give any financial information over the phone or send money unless you’re 100 percent sure who’s getting that money.

■ July 9. We get a call about someone brandishing a handgun at the 7-Eleven. Officers arrive and learn the subject appeared too young to have a gun, but he could not be found. Keep in mind Nevada is an open-carry state.

■ July 10. Officers get dispatched to an accident on Utah Street. The driver rear-ended a parked car. As one officer conducts the traffic investigation, the other officer investigates the driver possibly being DUI. A few tests later, the driver is taken into custody. The combative driver refuses to provide a breath or blood sample. A judge signs a warrant and we legally get a blood sample. The driver gets hauled off to jail, kicking and screaming.

■ July 11. Officers make contact with subjects involved in a road-rage incident at the 7-Eleven, across from Del Prado Park. The subjects get arrested, but one decides to run, with handcuffs. As he runs to Del Prado Park, a resident gives chase. The escapee boomerangs back toward the officer and then slips and falls on the handcuffs. Medical assistance was requested.

■ July 12. A motel employee calls about a possible domestic disturbance between a brother and sister, both in their 50s. Did you say substance abuse? We arrive and determine the admitted methamphetamine-using brother hit the admitted methamphetamine-using sister. He’s off to the big house for domestic battery, and she’s following him for narcotics-related charges.

We made it! Rule No. 1 in police work: End the shift alive. So far this year in the United States, 61 of my brothers and sisters have been killed in the line of duty, plus nine K-9s. Stay safe.

Officer Jeffrey Grasso is a 11-year veteran of the Boulder City Police Department. He previously served as a police officer in south Florida for four years.

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