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Was that a cow that just flew by?

I had intentions of writing this month about my goal these past 18 months of gathering experiences as opposed to material things, especially as I get older.

My thought has been, I don’t agree with the “you only live once” or YOLO philosophy but rather, you only die once, you live every day.

Instead of going into all of that, which I may do at a later date, I decided to write about something we have all experienced, while still having a connection to my original topic.

This past Thursday-Sunday, I was in Colorado with my dear friend and travel partner, Jacqui. She lives in Minnesota, which has twice been my destination this past year and a half. We decided to go to Rocky Mountain National Park and in the process, the nearby town of Estes Park. I highly recommend both.

Here’s the part I thought I’d share that most, if not all of us, can relate to… flight delays.

We both flew into and out of Denver. I’ll back up a bit and explain the reasoning for both the delay and the photo that accompanies this column. On our way back to Denver, as forecast, it began to rain very hard. On our way from the car rental agency to the airport, we all spotted something I had never seen in person, a tornado. While it was many miles away, images of either a witch on a bicycle from “Wizard of Oz” or a flying cow from “Twister” entered my mind. And as pointed out via a very anxious-sounding woman in the van, “WHY ARE WE DRIVING RIGHT TOWARD IT?” Well, the airport was in the same direction. While the twister thankfully did not hurt anyone, it did cause damage to more than a dozen homes.

We get to the airport, go through security and look on the big board to see our gate numbers, mine to Las Vegas and hers to Minneapolis. Same concourse, great. But it didn’t take long before the departure and arrival signs began turning red as more and more flights were delayed and the text messages to me from United began coming in at a fevered pace. Our flights were supposed to leave about 15 minutes apart. Mine was set for 6 p.m., so I went with her to her gate to kill some time. We got to the airport very early as we didn’t know what to see or do in Denver, especially in the rain. I got the first text from United at 2 p.m. saying my flight was delayed 45 minutes. Not too bad. Hers was also delayed by about that much. But while she was able to board and fly home, I received 14 additional texts letting me know each time that either my flight had been delayed or there was a gate change. I can’t recall ever dreading receiving a text as much as I did that night. Aside from five time delays, the gate number was changed four times with the final one being in a different concourse.

After three hours of changes, United did text me a food voucher for $15. It was appreciated but I got it 15 minutes after I had gone to the food court and had dinner. In order to not waste it, I bought some expensive jerky, which I’m munching on as I write this, in one of the little gift shops.

Finally, just before 10 p.m., we boarded the flight, which was packed. I got stuck in the middle seat. I now know how the middle child in any family feels. I’m 6-2 and weigh in at a svelte 195 pounds, so flying is not always the most comfortable for me.

To my left, on the aisle, was a bigger guy but he stayed within his own imaginary box the whole flight. I can’t say the same for the guy on the window. By the time we landed, he was sleeping at an angle with his leg clearly crossing the line. Any more and we would have technically been cuddling. Once awake, he did apologize.

This was on top of the crying baby one row ahead of me and the guy behind me who I dubbed Phil McPlegmy. Obviously sick and congested, he’d do the big sniff followed by the gulp. Oh, the friendly skies.

We landed around 11:45 p.m. and I got home about 45 minutes later. While I was not ready to leave Colorado, in this case, to quote Dorothy, “There’s no place like home.”

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